All my friends are in couples. When did this happen? One minute I’m happily bouncing around London – me and my single mingling friends frolicking and flirting – and then I turned around and they’ve all stopped, paired off and left me to keep skipping solo. It’s like when you’re shopping with your friend and having a good chat and then you turn around to ask them a question and realise they’ve fallen in love with a dress you passed and you’ve just been talking to yourself for a solid embarrassing 30 seconds.
It obviously didn’t all happen at once – the odd couple popping up here and there, but that’s how it gets you. It’s so gradual that you don’t notice until you’re the only one left thinking, “shit, did I miss the memo?”. You do a quick scan of your Facebook friends to find an potential eligible partner, re-install Tinder only to delete it approximately 5 minutes later, re-evaluate why all your past relationships ended, write a long messy drunk diary entry trying to convince yourself that you’re fine, and then settle on texting your one other last-standing single girl friend about how you’re the only ones left.
Social situations and meeting new people are very interesting when you’re the token single. It’s as if all your coupled up friends want to live the single life vicariously through you. They ask you a million questions when they see you talking to a guy at a party and when you don’t seal the deal it feels like you’re not only letting yourself down but all your friends who are eagerly observing your actions. Watching with binoculars from the other side of the room at a party. Do they actually do this or am I just extremely self-involved? I’m not going to answer that question.
Sometimes I want to yell, ‘JUST BECAUSE YOUR LIFE IS SO BORING DOESN’T MEAN YOU HAVE TO LIVE VICARIOUSLY THROUGH ME!’ but that’s really rude and I don’t actually think life in a relationship is boring so I never say that. But sometimes I think it a little bit. I hope that doesn’t make me a bad person.
I am 24 now. This isn’t like in school where there’s a wave of people getting together and then another wave of everyone breaking up. These relationships are getting real and intense. Some go on holiday together, some live together, some are married! It happens very slowly but in the last couple months I’ve been noticing and feeling it – the older I get the harder it’s going to get. I met 2 guys recently (at different events) who I thought were attractive and cool, took one look at their left hand and there was the wedding ring. And there’s only going to be more and more of those cropping up as I stumble through my 20s. Even though I love being single and I’m so happy it’s just hit me recently that I don’t want to be left behind.
Is anyone else going through a similar thing? Is this just a phase everyone goes through in their mid-twenties? Let me know in the comments!