Life

How I Feel About My Body Now

There’s been a shift recently in how I feel about my body.

Last weekend my boyfriend and I were getting ready for a theatre date night and I wanted to wear one of my summer dresses that I hadn’t worn since October. It didn’t fit. I couldn’t zip it up around my top half. And I broke. I burst into tears and it ruined my mood for the rest of the evening.

This was the final straw in a long string of things that over the months have been making me feel shitter and shitter about my body. A few months ago, I tried on one of my favourite dresses and it didn’t fit. I’ve been spilling out of my bras and had to buy loads of new bras and bikinis that actually fit me. That was a depressing day.

My body is just not the same as it used to be. There are only 2 reasons for this that I can think of.

  1. Hormonal changes since coming off the pill in July 2016. I can pretty much date the weight gain from then.
  2. Metabolism changes because I’m now 25. Every woman I’ve spoken to has said they’ve gone through a “second puberty” in their mid-twenties and gained weight.

I have my mum’s body now, except I haven’t had 2 children. (Nothing wrong with that, my mum looks banging).

The weird thing thoughย is that I didn’t even notice the weight gain. I think I look the same. My proportions haven’t really changed. I’m still massive boobs, big arse, small waist. I’ve just extended a few inches. And I don’t fit into any of my clothes.

I’m in Menorca right now on a working holiday and a couple days before I thoughtย fuck I haven’t worn summer clothes in MONTHS, I doubt I fit into any of them anymore. And I was right. I tried on a bunch of my clothes and the morning before my flight I rushed around shops to find a pair of denim shorts that fitted me. I’d gone up 2 UK sizes. Fuck me. How did I not notice this happening?

But here’s the catch. When I look at myself in the mirror in clothes, I hate my body. I feel awful. Unsexy. Undesirable. But when I look at myself in the mirror naked I think I look gorgeous. I love my body. I’m sexy and curvy.

I tweeted aboutย not fitting into my clothes and someone replied saying that the way to make yourself feel better about your body is to not put pressure on yourself to try and change your body to fit into your old clothes but to buy new clothes that actually fit.

And I think this is what I’m going to do. When I have some spare time, I’m going to go through all my clothes and anything that doesn’t fit me or doesn’t make me feel good I’m going to give to charity. Then figure out what’s missing and go shopping. Even thoughย I hate shopping.

I’ve not 100% come to terms with it internally yet but I have to keep telling myself: this is my body now and that’s fine.

What are you body confidence tips and advice? I need them right now. Let me know in the comments.

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79 Comments

  1. Firstly, you look absolutely stunning! Secondly, I relate to this as I’ve gained weight in certain areas and lost it in others this past six months, I’m nervous about the summer and trying to build my confidence before then, reading this post has helped me realise I can still be sexy and beautiful even as a slightly bigger gal, xx

  2. 1) from Caitlin Moran who thanks her body at the end of the day.
    2) from my husband who reminded me that when I walk down the street there’ll be others who will look at me and think “I wish I had her….” X x

  3. Such an honest post <3 You look absolutely smashing, but I understand the clothes size etc freaked you out. I always try and talk to my friends when I'm feeling down. That makes me realise we all have different bodies, we were given this one life/one body and we'll have to make the most of it. Who cares about the number on the label or the scale, to quote Ed Sheeran "remember life is more than fitting in your jeans, it's love and understanding, positivity":)

    Personally I am the exact opposite – I feel alright in clothes but I hate my body naked (tiniest boobs in the world, tummy, thighs etc while clothes can kind of hide this). Comparing yourself to other people is also the worst thing to do but personally my biggest pitfall.

    Hang in there! You are gorgeous!

  4. The advice you were given is absolutely wonderful advice. Your body is more important than the size you wear and you are more than a number on your clothing. Keep your head up.

  5. You look amazing in the pictures you’ve posted on instagram and whilst I know they will have been vetted like you mentioned in your previous post that doesn’t change you’re still “banging”. Lol.

  6. I’ve gone through the same thing myself, I had to change my overactive/exhausting lifestyle for health reasons and my body is having a hard time adjusting!

    I think the clothes clear out is the best way, but I also know it sucks to get rid of an item of clothing you really love!

    I know you’re always super busy, but have you ever tried altering clothes? This won’t always work, but it could be a cool way to teach yourself to sew if you don’t already, and also I feel really good wearing the clothes I’ve altered myself… It could be something simple, like adding in a sheer piece of fabric or some lace along seams by hand, replacing a zip with corset loops and some ribbon… lots of creative outletty stuff

    (also I have been massively procrastinating by watching April’s channel coolirpa, with LOADS of transformations of thrift shop things and they are extremely addictive and really cool, in terms of recycling/upcycling clothes)

      1. Omigosh yes! Well done for the ones you CAN wear- it always takes time and even on the unwearable items you at least learn what not to do (speaking from experience haha)

        Also Annika Victoria has some really really good stuff, and she talks a lot about ethical fashion!

  7. This is definitely so difficult! For me what really helps if I’m not feeling the best about my body is to eat foods that I know are good for me. Not to loose weight or anything, like I used to do, but because I know it will make me feel good on the inside. Because when I feel good on the inside the outside automatically seems to look better too! Also what I’ve been doing for my face, but I think it might work with your body too, is when you look in a mirror or see your reflexion you say: “wow I look beautiful/gorgeous/banging/hot!”. I notice that now it has become a reflex and I feel so much better about the way my face looks! Even if you don’t believe it at first, it will start to make sense to you in the long run. I really hope this helps and you will feel better about your body soon, because you are gorgeous and you deserve to feel that way!!

  8. Hey Hannah, I’m constantly struggling with body confidence and despite dropping 2+ dress sizes since being at uni (I just graduated) I still have moments where I look in the mirror and I’m just not satisfied (I’m now a UK size 6-8). Years ago being the size I am now is all I wanted and I thought it would solve all of my worries, and I would feel so much better about myself – but it hasn’t and I think it just proves that losing weight and being what you think is the ‘ideal size’ really just isn’t all it cracks up to be. What I’m trying to say is you could get back to the size you were a few years ago and feel no happier about yourself. As rich as it is coming from someone that also gets down about it, it really is one of the most insignificant things. When you have someone who loves you for who you are and loves your body and can’t wait to see you naked – does it really matter? Remember that you recognise it a whole lot more than anybody else does. Just be you, no one (including yourself) should care what size that is.
    Lots of love x

  9. I know from your bikini posts that you’ve already discovered Bravissimo, but I know for me, being able to find cute, supportive bras (and legitimately supportive and adorable swimsuits!) really helped my body confidence. I have a very similar body type to you (just taller!) and finding supportive underthings for huge boobs was an ordeal to say the least.

    Another thing that I found helpful was finding some body positive Instagram accounts and filling my social media feed with all kinds of confident, gorgeous women with a huge range of body types. It makes me smile seeing all these women embracing their bodies as they are and rocking outfits and bikinis they feel awesome in.

    Finally, if it’s in your budget, finding a good tailor can do wonders. I know how hard it can be to find flattering clothes when you’re curvy (especially the combo of big bust, curvy hips, and a small waist), and taking pieces you love to the tailor to get them adjusted to your actual body shape can make a world of difference.

    Also, you look fabulous!

  10. I think that the advice about clothing is so good!! I always try to remember that my body isn’t the problem, the problem is the clothes. Whether my clothes are too small or those I’m trying on in a fitting room make me look bad, it is not my fault!! That has made shopping so much easier on my brain <3
    Love, Emma xx

  11. Just want to say, I personally think your body looks amazing, both in bikinis and clothes ๐Ÿ™‚ I was watching some of your old videos recently and noticed that you have gained weight from previous years but that you look SO MUCH BETTER (and more attractive) now!

    In terms of body confidence, definitely finding clothes to fit your body rather than trying to fit your body into clothes is the way forward. A few years ago I gained a lot of weight (I was recovering from an eating disorder) and NONE of my clothes fit. Instead of getting down about it I took myself shopping and found some amazing jeans that I felt really confident in, ordered pretty playsuits online that I looked gorgeous in, then donated all my old clothes to charity.

    Also go shopping with a friend, someone who will be honest with you. Sometimes you can try something on and think you look ugly and unflattering, but in reality it’s just your mind focusing on the bits you don’t like about yourself. If you take a friend with you and ask their honest opinion, they will let you know how you ACTUALLY look in the clothes not what your mind sees. Another thing to remember is that all shop sizes are different so in one shop you could be a size 10 and in another a size 14 and it makes no difference, it’s just how the shop makes their clothes.

    Again in terms of clothes, make sure that you feel comfortable in them. For example, I really dislike my stomach and I bloat a lot so if I’m wearing something tight I will feel super self-conscious for the whole day. On the other hand, I can wear a dress with a flowing skirt and feel super pretty and sexy.

    Hope this helps x

  12. If I’m feeling particularly down about the way I look (in clothes and out of them) I’ll try and go and do something to “improve” myself one way or another. Recently a lot of my old tops started to get quite tight and it was getting me down so I went out and bought a new top and a new jacket. That combined with a bit of beard maintenance and compliments from my other half gave me a self confidence boost!

    Maybe if you hate shopping try not to replace your entire wardrobe in one go… you’re just asking for a burnout! If you go out each time with one outfit in mind it might be more manageable?

    Regardless, I hope you feel better soon x

  13. Hannah, first off, I think you look absolutely gorgeous! Like my dreamwoman, actually.

    Although that’s my opinion, I can understand it’s difficult when your body changes. I do have some confidence tips:

    – Basic mental health struff. I’m not sure what your diet and exercise routine is, if you have one, but for me personally I feel good when I’m healthy. Eating good things, fresh and whole foolds calm my mind. And exercise is the best stress reliever for me. And no, not exercising and eating healthy to lose weight! The goal is a healthy mind!

    – Try online shopping. I hate shopping as well and I hate the mirrors in fitting rooms even more.

    – Own it! Wear clothes that accentuate the features you’re most proud of.

    – Your body is just your body. I understand and relate to the fact that you feel like people will judge you for the way you look. But it’s all about what’s in the heart and in the brains. And from what I know of you, you are incredibly smart and kind.

    – Also personally I feel sexy when I wear heels. Not sure if you’re into heels. For me it helps.

    Thank you for your honest post.

    PS you’re hot.

    Lots of love!

    Nicole

  14. Your body is fantastic, I was looking at one of your instagram photos the other day and I adored the denim shorts you were wearing and one of the first things that went through my mind was I wish I could look like that.
    I have always struggled with my weight, I really struggle to lose weight. However if you can look at yourself naked in the mirror and love what you see then that’s all that matters. A lot of people shy away from themselves, I do especially, even though I go to the gym religiously and even have a PT to keep me going but loving your body is a massive thing.
    Just don’t think about the sizes on the rack, honestly, I don’t believe they matter, love yourself, be happy and enjoy life ๐Ÿ™‚
    You are wonderful

  15. Dear Hannah , I understand what you’re going through very well.

    For as long as I can remember I felt like I was too heavy , even though now I see I simply was a little chubby . Today , I’m curvy and I’m starting to love everything about that.

    In my earlier teens, I developed (as many other youngsters unfortunately) an extremely negative body image and an eating disorder , which haunted me for years . It was a vicious circle, especially because I gained weight naturally in my teens and have a slow metabolism. I hated not fitting in my pants anymore , I got panic attacks and cried for hours

    What I’ve learned though , is that weight changes , it’s not constant it’s fluctuating. I have learned that “skinny ” isn’t the only way to be beautiful.

    Today , I have more pimples , shorter and messier hair ,thicker thighs and broader hips. But even though I looked “prettier ” to society’s standards , I feel more beautiful today , because I love me.

    My top tip is to find clothes that you feel pretty and comfortable in . I spent too much time hating what I saw and hating fashion because I thought ,because I was fat I had to hide myself. Find items and cuts you think look great on you and it will boost your confidence like crazy.

    Hope this helps โค

  16. It’s like you’re reading my mind here! I’ve gone from a 38C to a 40E in 6 months and I only realised when I tried to wear my summer clothes from last year (which are now sitting in the charity bin on Kilburn High Road). It’s not just my boobs, but my bum, and thighs, and waist have all got an extra couple of inches.
    I’m now taking some time to come to terms with my new body and realising that it’s not bad, it’s just different and this is what 30 year old Kim looks like and she should continue to be the sassy cat she always was. Excellent advice to not try and squeeze a new body into old clothes – use the opportunity to invest in some items that fit the new you!

  17. You sound like your taking steps to turn it into a positive time which is AWESOME! And it should be because you look amazing! I’m so jealous of your boobs and waist. I suffered from an eating disorder and when I gained the weight on through recovery it was horrible. And now a few years on, if I find myself gone up a dress size I do stress about it but I just use it to go shopping and buy some sexy ass clothes to fit my new body. I make the clothes work for me-not the other way round. Keep your head up girl, you’ve got this!

  18. Please please look into the body positivity movement! It is everywhere right now on social media, particularly Instagram. It honestly helped change my perspective on how I see myself! As a ‘plus’ size woman I’ve dealt with a lot of self hatred over my fluctuating weight and body positivity helped me see that it’s not healthy and that I should feel fabulous about myself no matter what I look like! I still have a long ways to go and still struggle, but now I can wear that crop top without caring about what other people think. I would recommend looking at Bodyposipanda, Cupcakethighs, Effyourbeautystandards, abeauty_and_abeast, Franhayden, Amyeloisew and there’s so many more.

    I know this is your own journey but I think you’re amazing <3

  19. Hug/pet yourself, and tell the parts of your body why you love them. It easy to come up with reasons why you should. Feet carry you, back supports the whole frame and protects vital organs, ect.

    Doing this helped me a lot. I have gained a lot of weight the past several years.

  20. I’m recovering from an ED and I’m going through the same thing right now. All of my favorite clothes are slowly becoming too tight and it makes me so upset. Yesterday I wore a pair of jeans I thought I looked great in but when I came home, I realized the seams had stretched to the point that there will no doubt be holes in them soon. No one talks about how much it sucks to lose all of your old favorite clothes, but I did feel so much better when I went and bought some new dresses. Stretchy maxi-dresses won’t betray us! Hang in there, though. You look sooo gorgeous. For real.

  21. I’d say follow your own advice and walk around naked more when you’re alone in your room. Get used to this “new” body, the way it looks, the way it feels, in front of a mirror maybe but also under the touch of your own hands. Feel its softness. Rub yourself in coconut oil. Touch, touch, touch. I think the first thing is just to be with your body as is, without caring about clothes or mirrors. Take photos of it. Ask your boyfriend to take photos of it. If you can, pay a professional photographer to take photos of it (I remember on Tumblr following a few sex blogs who also offered photography services, it was in the US but it was always so gorgeous).

    Also, another great tip is to image how you would feel or what you would say to your best friend or your boyfriend if they were having the same trouble as you. For instance I have a really, really skinny body, I just cant put on weight due to a really fast metabolism, my bones appear everywhere under my skin, I have no curves and sometimes when I’m naked I feel so unfeminine and unattractive. I generally don’t think about it too much, but my boyfriend on the contrary is a bit chubby, he put on weight last year and it put him down a little, he doesn’t really get used to it. And everytime he talks to me about it all I can think of is how much I absolutely adore his soft tummy, and his butt and his love handles (I often put my hands on his love handles and tell him it’s my way of recharging on love). So after a little while I started thinking why don’t I speak to myself and my body the way I speak to my boyfriend and his body? And it really changed my perspective on things. Same thing with your best friend, or any friend really… Just remember that you are your own best friend, and this body is your home.

    And definitely. Instead of crying at the thought that you don’t find your clothes anymore, just buy clothes that fit. You will feel so much better in your skin. And even though I know self love can’t come from someone else, it might be a little helpful to remember regularly that your boyfriend certainly finds you dreamy and perfect as you are now, and will always do no matter what changes your body goes through.

  22. You are amazing, and I have to thank you for talking about it, because is something that it’s freaking me out right now.
    This time of the year always means a struggle for me, but this lasts years it has been horrible, I used to wear shorts and dresses all the time, and now I have the feeling I look disgusting on them.
    But I have the same problem you have! When I look at myself in the mirror I dont see that many problems, ok I’m chubby, but I’m healthy, and I’m curvy.
    I have mixed feelings all the time, when I see plus size models and I think they are gorgeous, and I see people that look more fat than me and I think they are beautiful, but when I look at myself next to them I feel so bad…

    In any case, you are amazing, and I admire you, I think we need more people like you, open minded and able to talk about everything, you are so brave and it creates a change on society, little by little, we will get there.

  23. Honestly hannah you look very desirable but go to the gym.you really need it.not because of how you look but how you feel.

    You’re just conditioning yourself into acceptance but deep down you want something else.in THAT case i say: go and get it! You’ll never be 25 again,26 or 27.you only have one life.

    Go to a kick boxing club and have fun over there.you’ll have so much fun improving and learning skills that you’ll actually forget you went there to loose weight until one day you’ll go “heyy wow look at my new silhouette”

    The problem with work out is the notion of hard work that constantly remind you that weight loss pressure.and everyone around you looks so fit and attractive.serious just go try kick boxing

    Ps:please do give me a feedback if you consider trying it.i’d love to hear from you

  24. Thank you for writing this Hannah! I’m in exactly the same situation and it has been secretly getting me down for a little while now (I do think it has something to do with hormones as the form of contraception that I have is the depo injection, and my weight has been creeping up in the two years I’ve been on it). I would love to hear you talk about this more and when you start to feel more confident I’d love to hear any of your tips. I think you are wonderful – beautiful, confident and honest. You go girl! X

  25. So Leena Norms once made a video about body positivity that really helped me. She said to reming yourself that the body is a thing that carries you from place to place, does all the things to keep you healthy and helps you do stuff that you want do do. We tend to focus so much on the beauty of a body that we completely forget (or just take it for granted) how many cool functions our body has.

  26. Hannah, as everyone else is saying, you look stunning and soooo sexy, but I completely understand how you feel though. You can see yourself naked or in a specific outfit at look in the mirror and feel good about your body. And you try another outfit or you see a picture of yourself, and BAM you feel awful and you hate your body. Last year I went on a diet and I lost almost 30 pounds sooooo easily in about 3 month. I felt so good about myself, I was thin, I ate well, I was running half-marathons, I was running faster, I was thinking, GOD, I’ve changed, and it was so good. I just missed my big boobs a little bit tbh lol. But, but but but… I went of the pill (even though I’m not sure it’s the main factor), I slowly lost the control I had put on myself about my eating habbits, and I changed countries and… Some of (not all of it, for now) the pounds came back. And some of my “post-diet” clothes stopped fitting. And now it’s just mixed feelings between I have to learn to be at peace with my body and I want my thin body BACK!!! Sometimes I feel so sexy, with my curves and 30 seconds later, I’m depressed…

    All I want to say is that it’s not easy to always accept yourself, to feel good about your body and even to figure out what you want for yourself.

    So, you go girl!! You’re amazing and continue your great work, I love it!

  27. This may not be the most useful comment as I am a 16 yr old boy who has no idea about body confidence. I am a “chunky” guy to say the least, and hardly a good looking guy. I think I have always struggled with my body. From a young age I have struggled going swimming due to my lack of confidence in my body. Now I am trying to do something about it. Through a combination of dieting and exercise I have lost a stone. But I have also come to terms that my body is fine the way it is. Telling yourself you are beautiful, and surrounding yourself with friends who will make you feel body confident is a step in the right direction.

    Personally I think you absolutely drop dead gorgeous, and I think your boyfriend is a very lucky man with an extremely sexy and successful woman at his side.

    I wish you all the best in your journey to achieving body confidence.

    Josh xx

  28. And also look to the late great Carrie fisher for body confidence. She was and still is a great role model, not caring about what people thought of her and her body. Just thought I would try and make a link to star wars. Can’t wait for the Last Jedi.

    Josh xx

  29. Hi Hannah !
    These thoughts are really interesting. For the past few months, after going back to the pill for medical reasons, I noticed many changes in my body. During the past few months, I went from a boring job in Paris making me unhappy, to being unemployed, at my parent’s, doing wayyyyy more physical activity… but eating less heathly because I’m at my parent’s…
    So… some changes happened… strange ones… Crossfit made me gain muscle on my arms, shoulder and back, but losing visible abs, but also losing fat on my legs, lifting my butt etc… So I feel good that I am stronger, but the more fat I seem to have on my belly, the more unhappy it makes me. Because of my back muscle gain, I can’t fit in most of my desses. I felt strange trying them on and not being able to zip them to the top.

    In the end, I guess we should focus on the parts we love, and look at ourselves in the mirror as if we were looking at a friend’s body. We are usually way harsher on us than on friends. As for the muscle gains, I guess I like to focus on the fact that I am now able to do stuff with my arms that I could never imagine doing a few month ago..
    Dunno if all of that makes sense, but your blog post definetely helped in the way that it shows we are pretty much all going through the same thing at some points in our lives.

    Love yourself and please, keep being an awesome inspiring person Hannah ๐Ÿ™‚

  30. When you said you felt terrible in clothes, but felt beautiful naked I resonated with that for some reason. I’m not quite sure why. And when you talked about thinking you looked the same, that too, I was like, yep. I feel that way as well.
    How I’ve decided to embrace my body? Honestly, I feel like a fraud if I say I’ve figured out an easy answer to that, because I still have trouble with it. Hence the puddle of clothes all around my room which I shed because I don’t feel comfortable or fit them. But…to go through life continually hating yourself because of your shape isn’t going to help anyone, including you, isn’t it? That will only result in your body curling into itself – and by that point you won’t even have a shape to hate on. You’d have transformed into something else entirely, a blackhole of self loathing. And as you, and I, absolutely adore space, we shouldn’t resign ourselves to the terrifying and monstrous entity that resides there. We should be brilliant suns. Radiant and alive no matter the occasional flares of self-hate. Cue cheesy, upbeat music.
    All the love xx

  31. You’re an absolutely beautiful specimen of a human being. I wish I had more confidence in myself. I’m currently in year 11, going through the most emotional point in my life so far. I got into my first relationship a few months ago (he’s a year younger than me as well) and now I’m going through exams and on top of it, I’ve gained weight. Lots. No one else seems to notice but my favourite pair of shorts no longer fit and this is not something I’m happy about. This is not puberty. I’ve had boobs for ages now and I’ve gone through the crappy bit. This is stress eating. Today I looked at myself and I was so deflated. I’ve never been “pretty”, I have a peculiar face and a large nose which I despise, but I always loved my body. Now, not so much. i know this is normal at my age, but it sucks.
    However you Hannah have absolutely nothing to be uncomfortable with. This is not because I think you’re gorgeous as hell, but it is because after five minutes of speaking to you, everyone will completely forget about how you look because you’re so incredible intellectually. Not that you should care what we think anyway. But keep it in mind, even when you’re on worst day in terms of body confidence, you still have a remarkable, extraordinary and curious mind. I hope you get your confidence in your body back.

  32. What I would say is if you are planning to reshape back to what you were, but don’t have that much of a care to when you do it, DON’T toss all your favourite clothes out. Like, if you have three favourite, “banging” smaller sizes that you often wear, keep them at the front of your closet. Have them so that you still reach for them as you wake up or have morning changings.

    I would also say go to bed earlier to wake earlier. Why? You are going to feel like your day is going to be further ahead and you have a liitle extra time. Then, when you reach for that dress, you have time for emotion, and then motivation to hit. Eat a better breakfast. Try some quick exercises. Actually, if all you did was go through a routine of stretches for 15 minutes, you’ll be happy what happens.

    –The above part is what I asked my 78 year old grandma how she viewed herself. I did a school health project. Most moms, like you mentioned, have weight change before 30 or lose it to kids. She had 10 of her own rugrats and maintained a relative figure. The worst she had after she started smoking at 16 and gave it up when she was pregnant with my dad at 18. Her words were “ballooned” and “trunk like.”

    ++My extra is, and please don’t think to negative, don’t feel embarrassed. My lord! You are sexy! If I was the lucky bloak, I would definitely be the guy dying to get you out of clothes, under covers, banging, groping, spooning, laying face-to-face making funny face-to-face. That might just be me because I love pretty faces which I have been thinking since you were in Dr. Doe’s derogatory words episodes. “Bloody wankers.” Face is still exceptional. It’s only the thing three inches behind your faces keeping you from being the most happy.

    Thanks for reading and/or just killing time with my thoughts.

    Zagreb is the capital of Croatia.

  33. Firstly Hannah, you are a very beautiful lady. I think this is an issue many of us could gain something from talking about. Our bodies never stop changing, yet for some reason we are taught that what we have at 21 is what we should always have. Since the age of 25, my boobs have inflated and since this happened I have increased one size in tops. I also became massively hung up on slimming to a particular hip size and one day I realised that I had been fighting with the shape of my body for years. My hips haven’t changed but I have been wearing jeans that are too small for ages because I couldn’t accept that I was that size. I exercise regularly and have a super healthy diet. I have accepted I will never be a skinny waif, my bone structure wouldn’t allow it because my hip bones would stick out! Also sometimes we need to step back from the numbered sizes because there is a considerable amount of articles showing clothes sizing is inconsistent across brands and labels. I’m not saying this is always the case, my boobs definitely grew a lot, but I think we all know some shops sell their clothes smaller than others. Let go of the numbers ladies! Stay healthy, happy and positive.

  34. Firstly, can I begin by commending you on writing such an open and honest post because they take guts.
    In regards to body positivity I think it’s all about shifting your mindset to an acceptance of what an amazing body you have (both in all the incredible things it does all day, and because you look stunning so who cares what size you are?!). Furthermore, it’s about shifting your mindset from what you don’t have to what you do have. Instead of seeing your so called flaws (which fyi are not flaws, flaws don’t exist, there is only one you which makes you by default perfect etc etc (I hope that makes sense)) focus on the things you love (because there is no shame in loving your body and thinking that you look good, no matter how much we’ve been brought up to be overly modest). The other part is to not care about dress sizes. They fluctuate from shop to shop anyways, so while you might be a 14 in one shop you might be a 12 in another. Cut out the dress size label once you’ve bought something if it helps. By wearing the correct sized clothing that suits your body (no matter what the size is) you will look and feel better because it will be a heck of a lot more flattering than something too small that tries to swish you body into shapes it’s not supposed to be in. You say you love your naked frame with all its curves, embrace this and find clothing that accentuates this so that you can see this even when you are wearing clothes.

    (I’m gunna wrap up now cause this has gone on a bit, but I have so many thoughts on the topic having grown in body confidence over the last year)

    If there is one piece of advice that you should take away, it is what I call the WHO CARES? approach. Every time I’ve pointed out something wrong with my own body, compared myself to someone else (NEVER COMPARE YOURSELF TO OTHERS that’s a biggy in becoming more body positive) or gone up a dress size, I by default now say to myself ‘Who Cares?’. Genuinely, it’s a great response to this, and so many other things to be honest. Who cares if you’ve gone up a dress size? You outer body says nothing about who you are on the inside, which is what matters at the end of the day and what people will remember. You are an incredible, inspiring woman doing great things, that is what counts way more than anything else.

    Anywho, before some emotive inspirational music starts playing in the background I’ll wrap up, but if you want a boost can I thoroughly recommend checking out the Instagram body positivity community (start with bodyposipanda and go from there) because they are incredible people that are spreading a wonderful message and will probably give much better advice than I just have…

    Good luck, you’ve got this ๐Ÿ’ช

  35. Hey Hannah, first of all I love your posts!

    And you look gorgeous!

    But I know exactly how you feel. I stopped using the pill in November 2014 and my body changed a lot, especially my belly. My clothes doesn’t fit anymore and I gained weight and I am now two sizes bigger.

    I would like to give you some advice but it’s not always that easy:
    Try to love the body that you have, this amazing body keeps you alive, allows you to move and have fun.

    Look in the mirror and tell yourself that you are beautiful, gorgeous and worth it. And you are enough in this very second! Not in one week, one month or one year. Now.

    You are beautiful!

    I think if you like what you see in the mirror when you are naked, you are on a good way! Stay positive!

    Have a nice weekend.

    Please excuse my English, I’m from Germany.

    Lots of love
    Juliane

  36. I’ve recently lost a lot of weight due to suddenly doing exercise. I’m 14 and although it sounds young and I’m still going through puberty I feel like I’ve lost my bum and have just kept the weight in other places, like my face and hips. At least you’re not me lol

  37. I can really relate to what you’re going through. When I started uni I actually lost a lot of weight – around 40 lbs – very quickly and mostly due to stress. I didn’t lose it in a healthy manner – it was me forgetting to eat and exercising way too often.

    Now that I have a full-time job, eat whatever I want/anything convenient due to time restraints, and usually never feel like working out. I’ve gained back those 40 lbs I lost.

    The thing is, I’m not technically overweight. I just miss being extra thin like I used to. Mostly because of all the compliments I received after the weight loss: “You look great!” “How did you do it?!” “You inspire me.”

    I feel fine when I look into the mirror. It’s the clothes I used to fit in – the size 4s… now size 8s – that make me break down.

    I doubt I’ll ever get back down to the weight/size I used to be – mostly because it was an unhealthy weight. But, looking back at photos of myself, and the clothes I have stacked up and don’t have the strength to get rid of, really get inside my head.

    You look great and I thank you for sharing your story. It’s hard to talk about. Keep doin’ ya thang, girl. <3

  38. Hannah I 100% have been in this position. The best thing to do is not hold onto those items that you love, which is so hard! We grow so attached to them because they hold memories and sentimental value, but hold onto the photos of those times, and the images where you were wearing them and you looked bangin- because the outfit itself will just be a looming thought in your head that you aren’t “good enough”, “thin enough”, “cute enough”, to wear me anymore. And thats just not true. The fact is, you’re just changing, and you are going to fit into new clothes, and they will be adorable, sexy and hot too!

    You are beautiful, and you are hot! And the fact that you can see that naked is a testament to your self worth and admiration and value internally and thats way better than so many other women out there!

    My advice for shopping is always go in with ZERO expectations! Approach every store with the mentality that you’ll never find something, that way when you do it’s a happy surprise! It always makes me feel better and I never leave crushed if I don’t find anything!

    Good luck love, hope it’s not dreadful! xx

  39. After being weighed at the doctors recently and realising I’ve put on a stone since last Summer, I felt exactly the same way!

    Initially heartbroken and a little scared that I put on so much weight without even realising, for the following days I felt extremely self conscious, as if everyone around me had just realised my weight gain too.

    My advice would be not to equate weight with happiness – despite the weight gain I’m (just) in a healthy BMI and maintain a happy and healthy lifestyle.

    As long as your happy, you’ll look beautiful to those who love you.

  40. I feel like all my body confidence tips you’ve mentioned in videos (bc you are super smart and wise), but here they are in case you need to hear them again:
    1. BE NAKED/in underwear. My body confidence skyrocketed a couple years ago when I got in my first long term relationship; not because I needed a partner to ‘desire me’ or some shit like that, but because suddenly I spent hours just lounging around naked with someone.
    2. sport, but NOT TO LOSE WEIGHT. I initially got into running when I was in the depths of an eating disorder as a means to lose weight. 4 years on, I’m largely the same weight but feel so much better about my body because I know it can bash out 20 miles and run 5k in 21 minutes. So find your sport, whatever you enjoy – swimming, boxing, climbing, walking, football, whatever. Just remind yourself what your body can DO.

    (as a shameless plug, I’m running a marathon on Sunday (eek) and raising money for an eating disorder charity. Donations go to helping people feel good about their body and not get eating disorders! >> http://www.justgiving.com/jesshusbands)

  41. OMG the most perfect article ever! I go through the same process at the moment, and it felt really heartwarming to read you. This new body, I have to learn to live with it and to know how to love it the way it is. It’s quite terrifying in today’s society where we are told to be this thin or to follow that kind of beauty standard. Loving our own self is so empowering, we need to spread the world!

    Plus you are damn gorgeous, I could have a crush on you right now ๐Ÿ™‚

  42. I totally know how you feel because I feel exactly the same. I’m 26 and 100% hit a second puberty! Clothes that used to fit me have been thrown away and I’ve got a few new bits but I’m also not a fan of what I see in the mirror. I mean I dig my but, the rest I could do without. Personally I will be heading back to the gym not so much to transform my body although that will be a thankful side effect but because I know when I go to the gym it makes me happy – those endorphins though! But yeah I agree if you have clothes that fit it’ll make you feel miles better! Ps you look absolutely bangin in that picture! X

  43. Gurl you look hot, Hot, HOT! You look like a goddess. There isn’t any part of your body that I wouldn’t put in my mouth. Soz, if that got too pervvy.

  44. I think the clothes tip is best, I like to online shop and then I can try them on at home- with tea and maybe a friend?

    There is an amazing YouTube channel stylelikeU a variety of people sit and tell you about them selves and their body image and how that relates to their style while they undress. Its beautiful and inspirational and really helped me change how I looked at my body. Worth a look!

  45. I’m going through the same thing right now! Coming off the pill, hitting 25 (ahem..26) and going through lifestyle changes like full-time job instead of uni life put me in a place where I didn’t find my clothes any more. Trying to find the courage to just donate them instead of putting them in a bag for “when I’m small again.” The problem is that weight gain, and weight loss are expensive, having the money to constantly invest and reinvest in clothes when you yo-yo in weight is pretty hard on the budget ๐Ÿ™

  46. I know how you feel. I’m in uni and this is a really bad time because of exams: I eat loads and spend a lot of time sat in the library. I also usually gain weight during winter and then lose it over summer, so the beginning of summer is a very awkward time of floppy, white skin. But when I look at myself in the mirror, naked, I like it. It’s the clothes that feel wrong, the summer clothes that I usually see on my slim, tan body. I have no confidence tips, but I’m glad that we’re going through the same thing x

  47. THIS!!

    Got tears in my eyes reading this because I relate SO MUCH. I also got off the pill late last year and I’ve gone up since that, and my boobs have always been big but now they are massive. I’m also turning 24 this year. Been feeling so shitty about myself, been feeling like I don’t know my body and just super uncomfortable. I am putting in some serious effort on the self-love front. I also got diagnosed with PCOS so that’s definitely effecting my weight as well, and the only cure is to go on the pill again, which sucks. All the love to you Hannah, feels amazing to know that one is not alone. Maybe talk about this in your Hormone Diaries? Been loving those videos. xx

  48. I’ve gained some weight since last September as well and I’m only now starting to like myself the way I am again. I ate like crap for a big period of that time and since I’ve started loving myself again, somehow I feel like eating healthy a lot more than before. Weird, I know.
    I used to always be the “fat kid” when growing up, so when I lost 15 kg after a horrible car accident two years ago, I thought I would never go back to that. I’m almost at pre-accident weight now and I feel great about my body.
    My secret is: I look at myself naked in the mirror regularly, I look at all my scars, my stretch marks and every bump on my body. I examine myself. And I tell myself I look beautiful. Straight up tell my own reflection how great of a person I am and that I look good. Then I smile at myself and go about my day. This routine has really helped me a lot in the last couple of weeks. Also following body positive accounts on Instagram is a huge inspiration and motivation to love myself!
    Love fro Austria!

  49. This may sound silly and may make you feel silly at first but tell yourself the following everyday: “I respect and love my body. I am beautiful.” It helps ๐Ÿ™‚

  50. I’m going through the same thing right now. Gained over 10kgs over the last few months and only noticed it a few weeks ago. Felt like shit because my clothes didn’t fit and especially my shorts which I haven’t worn since last summer. I honestly thought that I’ve washed my clothes too hot, sadly that’s not the case.

    But whatever. “Accept what you can’t change”, right? So I went shopping and bought some stuff that fitted right. Had to buy XL instead of L. Worst. day. ever.

    Well. I’m gonna start exercising again. Not because I’m trying to “fit in society” but because I want to take a look into the mirror and say “Daaaamn!” again. In a positive way ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Btw. you look gorgeous and I’d date you anytime, anywhere in the world. Don’t brainfuck yourself too much, I love you the way you are.

  51. This sound extremely similar to my own experience over the past year. I used to be extremely confident and almost unaware/unconscious about my body. However when I became bogged down in college work I lost a lot of weight very quickly because I wasn’t eating due to stress. Suddenly I was getting loads of compliments about how skinny I was (mostly from girls I must add). It was weird because I didn’t feel well and I certainly wasn’t eating well but yet It felt like I was doing something right because of all the positive attention I was getting. Then when I started to eat healthily again I gradually got back to my previous weight, and then surpassed it. Although I didn’t notice the weight gain personally I wasn’t fitting in any of my old clothes and ended up only wearing leggings and slouchy tops because it was the only thing I felt comfortable in. Just like you I loved my naked body but felt awful when I looked at myself when clothed. It made me aware of my body in a way I have never been before because of the way clothes fit me. Buying new clothes was a real confidence boost. Although I had jumped from a size for to a size 10, I felt good in clothes again rather than shamed by the clothes that didn’t fit me. My weight has now settled down and I am finally seeing my body in a positive light but the dramatic changes, and in particular the change in clothing sizes, definitely made me more self conscious.

  52. Hannnah, you’ve got this i am a 16 year old who’s going on 35. I still hate my body, I’ve struggle with body dismorphy and am a swimmer which means that i see my body way to much to hate it any longer. If you dislike your body in clothes pick out something that you feel super beautiful in. For me thats really nice underware, that makes parts of my body feel better or my favorite speedo swimsuit. You can do this, if you don’t like a specific part of your body, i wouldn’t say hide it but if you feel especially bad about it put it under something really comfortable. For me thats over sizes t-shirts.

  53. The same thing has happened to me over the last couple of years and it can be a blow to the confidence. However, I always think how amazing your body is, your proportions are insane and I can’t deny your boobs look cracking! Embrace your new size โ˜บ๏ธ

  54. I think that you look amazing. I don’t really have much body confidence, but I’ve been writing things that I get a lot of compliments on and things that people make fun of me for and I weigh how many times I hear them and their worth. You have a body that most people I know would kill to have. Sizes don’t matter. Think about how you would think of others (especially loved ones) if they had your same body size or other people that do. What would you think of them and what would you say to them?

  55. Hannah, you look banging hot! But I feel you, but for me it’s the other way round…when I have clothes on i think i look sexy and beautiful but when i look at myself naked i feel that i have too small boobs, too wobbly tummy, too much cellulite etcetc. And also..i kind of don’t relate to my mirror image( or photos) meaning that sometimes i feel good about myself until i see what i look like in a photo.
    Something that always helps me tho is working out. Even after a week of regularly working out gives me a confidence boost. Most likely connected to the endorphin levels.
    Xx Leenu

  56. Hey Hannah,

    Apart from the obvious of you don’t need to worry, I realise that these comments from someone else will not matter if you do not believe it yourself. The same with the clothes advice, they will eventually be fun and make you feel even better, but if you are not ready to feel comfortable in them, they will only be a short term fix.

    The best thing (and it can only ever be in my opinion, but hey we’re all sharing opinions ๐Ÿ™‚ ) is to be comfortable i your naked self. I know you said that you like how you look and that is a great place already, but do you feel comfortable? Spend time naked, and just naked, doing ordinary everyday stuff. Watching the telly, reading a book, writing a blog and making tea. At first it feels odd, but it will eventually feel like just another choice if clothing. When you get to that point, then fully splurge on the new wardrobe ๐Ÿ™‚

    Also being comfortable naked totally boosts your confidence. I did the Spencer Tunick Sea Of Hull, 3200 people all shapes and sizes being totally normal.

  57. I totally relate to the feeling good naked but not in clothes thing. Defs get rid of some of the particularly tight pieces. Another body confidence tip is to find a sport that you love doing and do it regularly (mine is dance) it’s so much easier to appreciate your body for all the amazing things it can do rather than what it looks like!

  58. It’s good that you love your body as it is, the risk is surely that it may still be changing, which makes it worth monitoring for a bit just to see? The ideal is that if it is still changing then whenever it does find a new equilibrium & settle down you will still be very happy with it. The downside risk is that unless you are the most body positive person in the history of humanity, if it keeps changing indefinitely, eventually it will get to a place where you aren’t happy with it. Hypothetically, even if you were still loving yourself when you were only mobile with the aid of a forklift & enjoyed doing Jabba the Hut cosplay at Star Wars conventions, medical science might have suggested that things had gone a little too far…

    I think that if you monitor it then you can decide if you are still happy for it to change more or not, & that at some point you might say ‘OK, that’s as far as I want to go… because I reckon maintaining a weight/body shape you like is easier than losing weight to try to get rid of one you don’t…

  59. I can relate to this, because my weight has fluctuated my whole life. I’ve never really been thin, and I have an hourglass frame which some days I can love but some days it can feel tough – like when I need to buy a new dress and nothing is hanging in a flattering way.

    But I think that the key to feeling good about myself has been wearing 1) looser-fitting clothing and 2) clothes that make me feel great but are low effort.

    I hope your new wardrobe ventures suit you well and make you feel great. ๐Ÿ™‚

  60. Oh hannah! It makes me very sad that you feel that way about your body. It sucks that we have to live up to this supermodel stereotype.

    I can relate to your suspicion of the pill. I came off it two years ago and by 6 months I was heavier then I have ever been. Now two years on I have gotten to a happy weight for me where I feel healthy, I exercise, mostly eat healthy but indulge because I have a sweet tooth and definitely drink! I am in a better place but still not completely happy but I am getting there by trying to remind myself to not compare my body to others. Having a supportive network of family and friends definitely helps!

  61. I’ve been struggling with such weight fluctuations over the last 2 years – gained 15kg, dropped 20 kg, gained 20kg back again… and I’m feeling pretty crummy about my body at the moment, unless I really focus on being accepting and understanding of my body and mind’s needs.
    When I’m busy or stressed my weight goes up, and it sounds like you have reasons for your dimensions to have changed – so it’s a matter of coming to terms with it but.. I don’t know how and it takes committed constant work I think. The dedication to love and accept ๐Ÿ™‚
    Wearing clothes i LOVE has helped. To the point that I recently went through ALL my clothes and gave away all the ones that don’t fit me right NOW. Because I will find other favourites if I lose weight again. But keeping the ones that don’t fit simply frustrates me when I look for things to wear, and am reminded of my changed size.
    You’re completely rad. I love your ethos, your drive, your hilarious nature and your love of Harry Potter! Thanks for being an inspiration, even when you’re feeling crummy too ๐Ÿ™‚

  62. I went off the pill a couple of months ago too, and currently my body is doing the most bizarre changes. While on the pill my breasts got bigger, and bigger and wouldn’t stop growing (i have a relatively large breast size compared to my body to begin with, so in the end I was at a wopping 30H). Other complications like my mood and medical issues made me go off the pill eventually in Dec. 2016
    I hated my body. I felt disproportionate and weird. I looked at it and it felt foreign to me. Now that I am off the pill, my breasts go down slowly but surely, and the other issues seem to clear up. My body is changing proportions again, and I still don’t know if I am comfortable with that either. I am still learning to appreciate my new, still changing body (additionally I am nearly 26, so I get the second puberty thing!)
    One of the most important steps for me in getting used to it, was to go through my wardrobe and getting rid of all the things I bought and had that either didn’t fit properly anymore or I had because I thought I could hide behind it. I did not go through it alone, but with close friends who understand what I was doing. We sat in my living room had a laugh and got rid of the majority of my clothes. No tears, no sadness, just laughter and good friends.
    I want to tell you that I think you are absolutely fantastic, for sharing your insecurities and that you are so open about the changes of your body! You look beautiful and happy. You make me feel a little more secure as a small woman with a small waist, big bum and big chest. Thanks for that!

  63. 1. Don’t own scales. ALways felt better since I wasn’t regularly weighing myself
    2. Do a form of exercise that you find fun and that has measurable progress (I do aerial things like hoop and pole). That way you get good at something while keeping fit.
    3. You look fab and always have done ๐Ÿ™‚ And think that. Your body changing isn’t a bad thing, it’s something to adapt to and embrace ๐Ÿ™‚

    1. don’t own scales is actually a good tip ๐Ÿ™‚ obviously, if you were to start gaining an unhealthy amount of weight then it’s not a good idea of deprive yourself of scales, but for the time being, I find that scales just cause stress which isn’t really worth it ๐Ÿ™‚

      you look hot af btw ๐Ÿ™‚

      ps. I’m jealous ๐Ÿ˜‰

  64. Personally, I cannot see anything wrong with your body; as a guy, I have to say that your abundance of womanly attributes is a wonderful thing. That being said, I think the real question is why you have body issues. Are you worried about continuing to gain weight? As the picture you posted illustrates, you have a very nice body; and as you pointed out you feel sexy when you are naked, so it seems that the cause of the problem is your old clothes. Clothing can be replaced.
    When I was in my 30’s I weighed around 180 pounds, I now weigh over 300, which bothers me. I went to the doctor’s office and stepped on the scales and about lost it. I have never weighed this much before, and I do not like it. However, I do not sweat it a whole lot because for the most part I am still relatively healthy, and I still do most of what I did before I gained this weight. Being in my 50’s I am not out to impress anyone, so people can either appreciate me for who I am, or they can go hang. There are times I have to remind myself of that concept, I can either appreciate me for who I am, or I can get over it!
    As a side note, I stopped drinking things like Pepsi, and I have lost 14 pounds over the past couple of weeks.

    You stated that your proportions are still the same. Work with that, go buy something that makes you feel sexy when you put it on; not just lingerie, but something you can wear in public, something that will turn heads. When you see people turn to look at you because you are visually stunning, and/or sexy as hell, you will definitely feel better. It’s your body, own it! Get yourself a couple of outfits that are just sexy, not trampy, but sexy with some class, you know what I mean. Go out every so often just to see how many people are trying to hide the fact that they are watching you! I guarantee you will feel better about yourself/your clothes.

    And just in case I didn’t say it before: You have an amazing body! Whoever your S.O. is, s/he is a very lucky person.

  65. The advice you were given helped me so much, I’ve been feeling crap about my body and spent all of the past 8 months studying for finals- feeling pressure to lose weight but also feeling like i didn’t have time. Then last week I went out and bought some jeans (after 2 pairs had frayed around my thighs – making me feel even worse!!!) and now I feel better than I have in months – all because wearing things that fit has made me feel more comfortable in my own skin.
    I would also say that running/swimming – not even to lose weight – just makes you feel so much more confident about your body. When i go on a long walk I come back and feel happily tired out and proud that my body is strong and able to do that.
    And finally, you’ve got to think that the grass is always greener – girls would kill for your boobs and bum!!!

  66. The biggest thing for me is realising that my continual attempts to lose weight actually make me gain so there’s no point in hating it.
    I’ve had to keep repeating to myself “don’t hate the shake” and “the presence of someone else’s beauty does not mean the abscence of my own”
    You’d never look at a mountain and criticise it for not being as beautiful as the sea. They’re both beautiful but in different ways

  67. The biggest body confidence tip I can give you is this: post nudes. It sounds, crazy, creepy, and pervy but it’s also a fact. Think of it as an extension of gaining confidence by being naked with yourself. It’s no different than anything else you want to build confidence in. Let’s say, for example, you’re extremely at making string puppets like I am. I have no doubt that I can make great string puppets in my studio. When I start on a new string puppet my confidence level in this skill doesn’t even cross my mind. It’s assumed, from years of experience, practice, and training, that I can and will do it. But invite me to carve in front of 20,000 people with the spotlight shining on me and all of the doubts will creep in. If I keep practicing in front of 20,000 people then I’ll develop confidence that way. Furthermore, the confidence during my own private time spent making string puppets and making string puppets in front of audiences smaller than a literal coliseum will also increase. If I can do it front of 20,000, then I can do it in front of 300 and when I’m by myself I’m more confident in knowing that not only can I make amazing string puppets, but I can do it in front of 20,000 people. No sweat!

    My mentor, Arc X told me of a woman who he helped guide this way. He showed me videos of her evolution. First, she was scared to go topless on camera for the entire internet to see. She was afraid of losing her job, what her family would think, losing her youtube account, she was afraid of being sexualized etc. But she did it and now not only are all of her fears gone, but she has the genuine (not faked) confidence to tell people who sexualize her, post mean comments off. She talks to them like the immature children they are and no longer sees them as horrible monsters. Her name is Ceri. Look up “Topless Topics” on youtube and Vimeo.

  68. I have recently just accepted myself completely and honestly one method has helped majorly, testing myself. You know when you look at an item of clothing (for me a tight dress and a calf length skirt) and think it will never look good, I bought one and wore it into town just because I could and guess what, the world didn’t end. I stopped shaving my legs and wore shorts out. Stopped wearing a bra around the house (one of my biggest insecurities) and didn’t give a flying fuck when the delivery men came. Sent my friends Snapchats without double checking that it didn’t look like I had a double chin, showed as much cleavage as I wanted and ordered a large chocolate milkshake from Starbucks with whipped cream and drank while walking around despite my fear of people judging me for it. Please, Hannah, try it. Do what you’ve always been scared to do and start small if you must, just wearing it or doing it around the house if you must but it really helps. I did what I’ve always been terrified to do and I’m still here, more liberated than ever!

  69. You’re just fat. No offense. It aint hormones or 2nd puberty. Start exercising and stop eating so much. Hard truth hurts but trust me im a big fan of yours.

  70. When I feel bad about my body I just think about it like a rocket ship. When fuelled properly, my body is a vessel for my brain and feelings which allows me to go on adventures, read, walk, do what I want! And I love that.

  71. Hi Hannah,
    I’ve always been a quite tiny girl, with a very slim waist. As a kid, I felt like I was too skinny, and one day a friend commented on the fact, that you could see my ribs through my skin. I felt gros and weird, and for the first time I started looking critically at my body in the mirror. At this point I was under the average weight for my body type, and my doctor told me that it would be healthier for me, if I was to put on some weight.
    So I started eating. As a kid I never ate much, not because I didn’t want to, I just didn’t have the same appetite as some of the other kids. But as I started gaining weight, I felt more insecure about my body. At this point I also hit puberty, and therefore it all happend in a very short amount of time.
    Right now I have gotten to a mindset where my weight or size doesn’t matter, but the fact that I feel healthy, and pay attention to what I’m eating, and how much I’m exercising is more important. I feel more in control of my body. (I also turned pescetarian 10 months ago)
    Also, surrounding yourself with people who openly talks about these things, and shows interest in your issues, creates a good and safe place to share your feelings.

    I hope you get to a mental place, where you learn to accept and love the new size of your body. It takes time.

  72. Just ran cross your blog. Reading this, I really can’t add on to what others have already said that would not be merely piling on complements.

    Very truthfully, you are ‘DDG’ Drop Dead Gorgeous. In reading other blog posts you have here, you are far more than that, you are beautiful inside and out. Be who you are, absolutely stunning!

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