2018 has been the worst year of my life. I was in hospital, had 2 major emergency surgeries in the space of 5 months, have basically been in recovery all year and in limbo waiting to move house. I was fast asleep in my hospital bed ill, tired and weak when 2018 officially rang in, Happy Fucking New Year. Every other year before that I’ve been at a party with friends getting stupid drunk, dancing, singing and laughing until the early hours. I didn’t even get a new years kiss this year. So in my head it wasn’t real. 2018 never began. My 2018 hadn’t started yet.
Not to sound dramatic but this year feels like time wasted. Time I’ve missed out on and now I’m having to play catch up. But in the last couple weeks I’ve felt much more myself, more capable physically and mentally. I’ve got a huge work project that I’ve finally started after months and months of putting off because of illness and surgery and my head not being in the right place. But now my head is in the right place and I’m getting my teeth stuck into new projects and oh my god it feels so good!
My year has finally begun! I feel present, I feel excited, I feel productive!
But there’s only 2 and a half months left in this year so I have to make them count. This is it, my home stretch to make sure 2018 wasn’t a completely shit year. I want to build enough momentum that I can go into 2019 strong and healthy ready to take on whatever comes next. I know from the outside it may seem like bullshit, you might look at my blog or my instagram and think “but you’ve achieved so much this year!” And that is sort of true. I went to Buffer Festival in Toronto, I was on live national TV, I’ve done some pretty amazing photoshoots! But all year it’s felt like I’m treading water, that things are just happening to me.
Now it’s different. Since getting back from Toronto I have been full steam ahead! I’m in my new flat, I’ve got my home office. I’m typing this at my desk with an actual keyboard connected to a screen (not just on my laptop). I’ve started using a new to do list app (I’ll let you know how it goes). Whereas before it felt like things were happening to me, I’m now the one making decisions. I feel back in control of my life.
So here’s what I’m doing for my home stretch of 2018 to make it count! If you’ve had a hard year or just a bit of a meh year I encourage you to join in. Post what you’re doing for the last 2 and a half months of 2018! I’ve just come up with this now as I’m typing haha. Use the hashtag #2018homestretch to share what you want to achieve before the end of the year and we can encourage each other!
My #2018homestretch
- Run 5k! You may have seen on my YouTube channel I’ve started a personal fitness project called “Surgery to 5k”.
- Do Vlognukah! It’s my Jewish version of Vlogmas but this year I’m challenging myself to actually daily vlog dun dun duuuuun I’ve never done it before! So look out for daily videos 3rd-10th December!
- Secret project deadline! I hate keeping secrets but hopefully it won’t be a secret for much longer, the actual deadline is mid-January but I want to challenge myself to get it done before Christmas.
- Read 8 more books! Every year since 2015 I’ve set myself the challenge of reading 50 books. Every year I’ve failed. The most I’ve ever read was 38 (in 2016) and the least was 31 (in 2015). Currently in 2018 I have read 23 books. If I can read 8 more books between now and 31st December I’ll have at least matched my lowest score since I started counting. I just need to pick which 8 books they’ll be… you can follow me on Goodreads for updates.
And you know what, I’m going to stop there. Any more than that and I’m afraid I’ll fail. Realistic goals people! I would love to hear your #2018homestretch goals on social media or in the comments here. Let’s do this!
Photo by @sophiemayanne for Behind the Scars.
![I bloody love London. I’m not sure if I’ll ever leave. [skirt gifted from @pocheposh]](http://scontent-frt3-1.cdninstagram.com/vp/5ab32db6d940a735e7aee68c5215837a/5DB3C561/t51.2885-15/sh0.08/e35/c0.180.1440.1440/s640x640/66526628_987911064933965_2773216116778810581_n.jpg?_nc_ht=scontent-frt3-1.cdninstagram.com "I bloody love London. I’m not sure if I’ll ever leave. [skirt gifted from @pocheposh]")
![During all my travels this month I went to a yoga class with my family in Manchester. The studio had some work out clothes for sale and I saw this two piece and tried it on, bought it there & then and wore it to the yoga class!! 🌻🌻🌻💛💛💛 (the top bit is so small and only works over a sports bra on me, not sure if I could get away with it as a normal top over a normal bra) hmmmmm 👀 what is your one weakness when it comes to impulse purchases? Mine is sunflowers 🌻 [EDIT: actually a THREE piece! Can you see the scrunchie??]](http://scontent-frt3-1.cdninstagram.com/vp/1c8dfeff8e0db1e89e85ba30cf23a9c7/5DCAB6C8/t51.2885-15/sh0.08/e35/c0.180.1440.1440/s640x640/62589196_2079529185686293_2207866588124861769_n.jpg?_nc_ht=scontent-frt3-1.cdninstagram.com "During all my travels this month I went to a yoga class with my family in Manchester. The studio had some work out clothes for sale and I saw this two piece and tried it on, bought it there & then and wore it to the yoga class!! 🌻🌻🌻💛💛💛 (the top bit is so small and only works over a sports bra on me, not sure if I could get away with it as a normal top over a normal bra) hmmmmm 👀 what is your one weakness when it comes to impulse purchases? Mine is sunflowers 🌻 [EDIT: actually a THREE piece! Can you see the scrunchie??]")
![On a train back to London after lots of travel back & forth. I’m very hungry & forgot to fill up my water bottle - which, if you watch my new video you’ll know IS NOT GOOD IF YOU DON’T HAVE A LARGE INTESTINE. I get dehydrated very easily so will have to buy a plastic bottle damn 🙈 I’ve not been very active on insta whilst travelling & filming (except posting #latergrams) but hi this is me now. My new video about what I eat with a stoma is now live 💩 how are you??? 💛 [earrings gifted from @eejewellery, use code HANNAH for 10% off #affiliate]](http://scontent-frt3-1.cdninstagram.com/vp/c877ba61d3a6dd454c3f1d2a9755f6fe/5DE80C3F/t51.2885-15/sh0.08/e35/c0.180.1440.1440a/s640x640/65911927_146026423145613_6746642612021401548_n.jpg?_nc_ht=scontent-frt3-1.cdninstagram.com "On a train back to London after lots of travel back & forth. I’m very hungry & forgot to fill up my water bottle - which, if you watch my new video you’ll know IS NOT GOOD IF YOU DON’T HAVE A LARGE INTESTINE. I get dehydrated very easily so will have to buy a plastic bottle damn 🙈 I’ve not been very active on insta whilst travelling & filming (except posting #latergrams) but hi this is me now. My new video about what I eat with a stoma is now live 💩 how are you??? 💛 [earrings gifted from @eejewellery, use code HANNAH for 10% off #affiliate]")
This year I was diagnosed with depression. After some months of therapy and medication Im finally feeling stable and.well. So my #2018homestretch will.be to enjoy myself as much as possible, travelling, going out with friends and simply enjoying myself and my time. Also, given that my mind wasnt in the right place, im going to give as much as I can to my final months of the hospital residence, focusing on my job and its rewards. Love you and thank you for your post!
I feel like i’m Waiting for a year now.. so my goal still stands for the rest of the year:
Finding a new job in a new city and finally living with my long-distance boyfriend again!
Hi Hannah!
This is a great article. It might not mean much but we’re incredibly proud of you. Your dedication and perseverance is truly inspiring. I wish you all the best and I know you’ll still manage to make 2018 worth it. We love you, you strong badass woman.
xxxx
Here are my goals for the rest of this year:
– Read 4 more books
– Start going to the gym at least once a week again
– Apply for a few jobs
Oh that is a great idea! Before the year is over I want to (finaly) have finished my Bachelor thesis in history. I am in a bit of a low when it comes to writing/studying atm and could use some good motivation 🙂
I’m not really one for new years resolutione but somehow this speaks to me 🙂
my #2018homestretch
-attend those extra lectures that interest me
-read at least one more book this year
-do at least half my exams from this semester this year
-find a new way to grow as a human being
PS: i’m glad you feel better and back in control now!
#2018homestretch
1. I set my Goodreads reading challenge to 15 books this year but I’m managed 25 so far! So want to reach double of goal and read 5 more books this year!
2. Get my finances in order, as after a period of unemployment my savings have dwindled and I want to start building them up again.
3. Start running again. This was my new year’s resolution I never did so hopefully I’ll be able to tick it off in the last 2 months!
This is super inspiring Hannah, thank you!
I had a sigmoid resection two days ago. Before the end of 2018 i hope to be able to walk and to be on a hometrainer again.
It’s quite hard to break the grieving cycle, the loss of who you where or in sometimes might of been! I still miss the man I was before,
But it’s not healthy to be focused on the injury/health, oddly I’ve found support groups very helpful. Your mileage may vary.
Hello Hannah. Just a note to wish you all the best. Your successes have emboldened many of your readers. Keep up the good work.
Hi Hannah,
Back in 2010 I went into the hospital for a minor back surgery (there is no minor surgery…minor surgery definition is surgery that happens to someone else!) I came home only to be rushed back to hospital on Christmas morning with a busted bowel. I woke up from that one with an ostomy bag and a ileostomy. After 5 months I was lucky enough to have a successful reversal. Since then I have had a series of additional stomach and back surgeries. I have been in 3 times for adhesion issues. Still moving forward.
You have an amazing attitude. Keep on doing great things. Your blog should be mandatory reading for ostomy patients. I had no idea what people went through with these ostomy issues until I had one. The ostomy nurse’s first question to me was ” Have you ever considered suicide” !!! Not the best way to start. Almost like you were supposed to feel awful. I got through it though and am still kicking.
Anyhow I also have a walking stick. I really never gave a shit whether anyone thought it was weird or not. But everyone has been great about it. I have a very long one (a hiking stick) and I find it is much easier on the back and body than shorter ones. A physical therapist recommended it. Try it sometime if you have not done so.
Make 2019 the best yet. My 2019 goal is to stay out of the hospital!
I’m currently on an erasmus, so my plans are quite… Small and I won’t be mad if I don’t achieve them, but still:
– finish first draft of my book
– finish knitting sweater
– finish reading Idiot
– have a great christmass and new year’s eve
I really hope you’ll achieve all the things you want to ^^ You’re really an inspiration 🙂
Arghhhhh!? Arghhhhh! There is shit in this poor Nerd’s Dan’s hands! How could you do this to my sexy Dan!
Hi Hannah, hope you’re doing better now! It took me about 6 months to get fully back to normality! I had the same operation as you for the same reason 2 years ago, but mybop was done keyhole. I watched a video of you changing your bag and saw you holding it in place for a while for the adhesive to stick properly… there is a little time saving hack… put the bag onto a radiator for a couple of minutes whike you clean up… the adjesive gets warm and sticks instantly!
You are honestly an inspiration to many people, definitely a role model in my eyes❤️